THE VERY GOOD FRUIT

With my luck, this will be the one I win, a three-night stay at some to-be-announced la-di-da spa (with an Approximate Retail Value of $8,500, I think it’s safe to say this is a la-di-da spa; airfare is included) on, drum roll please, Beano, the natural anti-gas dietary supplement. Check out the URL: WWW.BEANOGAS.COM. This is serious.

There are actually two ways to enter this one: 1.) a contest, which includes submitting a recipe and a short essay about a friend and the recipe and how you support each other presumably in all manner of anti-gas assistance, and 2.) a sweeps, with a straightforward personal data entry.

I'm opting for the sweeps, as fun as it might be to write a little vignette about my best college friend and my shared love of healthful, delicious food and, while we’re at it, fart jokes. (How can I write about this and not go here?) My best friend grew up in francophone Africa, and I spoke a smattering of one-summer-as-an-exchange-student-in-France French. If I’m not mistaken, I think one of the first times I impressed her with my French was the day she realized I knew how to say “fart” in French. (If you're curious, it’s “péter.”)

I suppose I shouldn’t snicker here, because this Beano supplement might be doing a lot of people a lot of good. It corrects deficiencies of the enzyme alpha-galactosidase. Without this, people develop Complex Carbohydrate Intolerance, with all the predictable symptoms.

To enter the Beano Spa Sweeps, click HERE.

To enter the Beano Spa Contest (you must provide a recipe and an essay) click HERE.

Toot toot.